Harry Potter and Jane Eyre: How their miserable early lives stack up.

[cactuswatcher]

Harry's parents died and he had to go live at #4 Privet Drive in Little Whinging
Jane's parents died and she had to go live at Gateshead Hall.
Advantage Jane

Harry had a big scar on his forehead and had hair that wouldn't stay combed. (Been there, done all that!)
Jane was a plain little girl.
Advantage Jane

Harry lived with his thoughtless aunt who doted on her on child and his grumbly no-neck uncle.
Jane lived with his grumbly aunt who doted on her own children.
Advantage Jane

Harry's aunt had a nasty, mean son who tormented him.
Jane's aunt had a nasty, mean son who tormented her and two daughters.
Advantage Harry

When Harry got in trouble he was locked in a closet under the stairs that was full of spiders.
When Jane was in trouble she was locked in a lushly furnished bedroom.
Advantage Jane

Harry's nasty cousin became leery of him when Harry accidentally let loose a giant boa constrictor.
Jane's nasty cousin became leery of her when she socked him.
Advantage Jane.

During a stormy night of crisis the place Harry was staying was visited by a giant who came and knocked the door off the hinges.
During a rainy night of cirsis Jane's house was visited by someone walking across the lawn with a lantern.
Advantage Jane

During the crisis Harry asked the giant, "Who are you?"
During the crisis Jane passed out.
Advantage Harry.

The giant who told Harry about his new school gave Harry a birthday cake and cooked sausages for him.
The Reverend who told Jane about her new school gave Jane a thin pamphlet full of stories of little children who were naughty, then got sick, died and went to hell.
Advantage Harry

After Harry was first told about school, he was whisked away to Diagon Alley though he had to go back and stay at Privet Drive for a month.
When school was first suggested for Jane, nothing happened for months.
Advantage Harry.

When it was time to leave for school Harry got left at King's Cross Station where he had a hard time figuring out how to get to his platform.
When it was time to leave for school Jane's coach pulled right up to the front gate.
Advantage Jane

Harry got to ride to school on a special train where he met new friends.
Jane got to ride to school on a coach with no one her own age.
Advantage Harry

On the journey Harry got no meal, but bought some sweets which included chocolate frogs, that could jump away, and jelly beans that included flavors like axle-grease, dirt and shoe-polish. Harry traded some of his candy for a dried out sandwich which he didn't eat.
On the journey Jane was offered a meal at an inn, but she wasn't hungry.
Advantage Jane

When Harry arrived at Hogwarts he was given a boat ride across a lake and caught his first glace of school.
When Jane arrived a Lowood she walked through a door and caught her first glance of school
Advantage Harry.

The evening Harry entered Hogwarts he shared a giant banquet with the other students.
The evening Jane entered Lowood she shared a single mug of water and some bits of thin oat cake with other students.
Advantage Harry.

That evening Harry's headmaster gave a speech that sounded like "Nitwit! Blubber! ..." and then had everyone sing "Hogwarty Hogwarts."
That evening Jane's headmistress asked Jane if she could read write and sew, then touched her cheek gently.
Advantage Jane

At bedtime Harry found he would sleep in a room with four four-poster beds.
At bedtime Jane found she had to sleep in the same narrow bed with a teacher.
Advantage Harry

Harry's best friends were a know-nothing boy and know-it-all girl both of whom lived happily every after.
Jane's best friend was a lazy, but saintly older girl who soon died of TB.
Advantage Harry.

Comments

[atpolittlebit.livejournal.com]

I like this!