![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
Even if you are not a fan of Bones please read on. Last night's episode had an interesting theme to go along with an interesting crime. I'm giving the usual spoiler warning, but unless you intend to watch the show later I have a question for you now.
For those who may not know, the female lead Temperance "Bones" Brennan has been dating an FBI agent named Sulley for a few months. Last night's show began with Brennan about to spend a vacation with him on the beautiful sail boat he is renting and hoping to buy. They don't even plan to leave the dock, just spend the time together alone. But naturally a crime occurs and Bones is called away to look into it. Turns out the corpse has had all it's bones removed. Since bones are her specialty, she feels free to pass the case on to her colleagues and to get back on vacation. Another FBI agent Sealy Booth, the main male character, keeps finding ways to go interrupt them and bring her back on the case. After a few of these incidents, Sulley decides to ask Brennan "The Big Question." As Sulley starts to talk, Brennan believes he is going to ask her "The Question" and it's fairly clear from her expression the answer is going to be yes. But he doesn't ask her to marry him. He says he's leaving. He asks her to leave everything behind and sail away with him on a romantic adventure for a year. Instead of asking will she tie her life to his for the foreseeable forever, he essentially asks does she love him more than everything else in her life. It's fairly clear immediately what her answer will be. But in his long preface Sulley has asked her to take time to think about it. She does think about it seriously.
She asks both her co-worker/best friend Angela and her partner Booth what she should do. Angela, the romantic, tells her she should definitely go. From his manner Booth shows he doesn't want her to go. But he does tell her, if it's what she wants, she should go.
It's no surprise when she finally tells Sulley, she won't go. As part of the final scene, as Brennan watches from the dock, Sulley sails away revealing that he's named the boat after her. (It's both a romantic ending and not, because it's not only saying he'll remember her always, in showing her he's done it, he's also subtly saying, it will always be her fault.)
I'd like to ask - Do you think this kind of major ultimatum ever turns out well?
For those who may not know, the female lead Temperance "Bones" Brennan has been dating an FBI agent named Sulley for a few months. Last night's show began with Brennan about to spend a vacation with him on the beautiful sail boat he is renting and hoping to buy. They don't even plan to leave the dock, just spend the time together alone. But naturally a crime occurs and Bones is called away to look into it. Turns out the corpse has had all it's bones removed. Since bones are her specialty, she feels free to pass the case on to her colleagues and to get back on vacation. Another FBI agent Sealy Booth, the main male character, keeps finding ways to go interrupt them and bring her back on the case. After a few of these incidents, Sulley decides to ask Brennan "The Big Question." As Sulley starts to talk, Brennan believes he is going to ask her "The Question" and it's fairly clear from her expression the answer is going to be yes. But he doesn't ask her to marry him. He says he's leaving. He asks her to leave everything behind and sail away with him on a romantic adventure for a year. Instead of asking will she tie her life to his for the foreseeable forever, he essentially asks does she love him more than everything else in her life. It's fairly clear immediately what her answer will be. But in his long preface Sulley has asked her to take time to think about it. She does think about it seriously.
She asks both her co-worker/best friend Angela and her partner Booth what she should do. Angela, the romantic, tells her she should definitely go. From his manner Booth shows he doesn't want her to go. But he does tell her, if it's what she wants, she should go.
It's no surprise when she finally tells Sulley, she won't go. As part of the final scene, as Brennan watches from the dock, Sulley sails away revealing that he's named the boat after her. (It's both a romantic ending and not, because it's not only saying he'll remember her always, in showing her he's done it, he's also subtly saying, it will always be her fault.)
I'd like to ask - Do you think this kind of major ultimatum ever turns out well?
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
From:
no subject
Longer answer (and partly immediate reaction after watching it last night): Sully essentially decided he was going to buy the boat, sail away, establish a business giving boat/fishing tours somewhere south because he didn't like working with the kinds of cases Brennan and Booth routinely come up against, and wanted her to come away with him for a year because surely she must need a break from it without ever acknowledging that the work she does is clearly her life's passion. And the offer had no more permanence than "spend a year with me on the boat" as if he was hoping/certain that at the end of that year she wouldn't want to go back to her work. And honestly, I think it was that assumption that she would happily throw aside everything she'd worked so hard to achieve in order to spend a year with him. (Yes, who knows, maybe more, but he wasn't willing to commit to more than that where she, as you noted, was). To do the work she loves at the side of the man she loves who understands her passion for her work was one thing. To set aside the one thing that had defined her up to that point because he was uncomfortable with it, without any greater commitment on his side was a very different thing. So the long answer is still "no". Heh.
From:
no subject
Sulley was in a rough spot for sure, but I think going his 'overboard' was just a sign it really needed to end.
From:
no subject
I haven't seen that episode but I only tune in randomly. But judging from the few episodes that I've seen with Sulley in them, he's always made it clear that what he was doing now, working for the FBI, was a temporary thing. That he had other things that he wanted to do with his life, other interests and passions that he definitley wanted to experience. He was always a bit confused by the "one trickness" of Brennan.
And like Bit says, Sulley already made all these decisions for himself. Despite how "ideal" he might have been he didn't really seem to consider what Brennan might want. And I'm going to say it, I hate. Hate! The nickname that he calls her. Tempe! What kind of nickname is that? Yuck. Whoo. I just had to say that to someone.
From:
no subject
;o)
You're right about him not considering what she might want. Which is what makes it so sad that she did have feelings for him.
From:
no subject
From:
no subject
From:
no subject
From:
no subject
From:
no subject
From:
no subject
From:
no subject
I'm not saying he had to stay for her -- if he's determined to go and she's determined to stay, nothing for it but to end the relationship. But he can't just ask her to throw over her career without giving something in return -- there should be reciprocity.
From:
no subject
I do think that Brennan would have married him if he'd been willing to stay and put up with the distractions. Otherwise probably not. The fact that Sulley felt he needed to make her choose is both typical and sad. It was not recognizing something very important about the woman he loved.
From:
no subject
So, my answer is Noooooo! never, never. In making it an ultimatum, one person is forcing the other to choose to make that person the whole focus of his/her life. Any relationship that works, IMHO, must be one that allows the people in it to be whole individuals who choose to be a part of the other's life. If one's work is an important part of her life, as Brennan's is to her, giving it up for Sully won't make her happy in the long run. It's all very well to say that a couple should be together as one, but it is just a romantic vision that doesn't work out.
I speak from limited experience here; my ex husband was very controlling, and wanted everything to revolve around his needs and wants. Even things like my learning T'ai Chi ended up being about him. He resented me focusing on something he didn't know how to do. I ended up after several years of marriage feeling like an invisible person.
*gee, I think your question hit a nerve!*
From:
no subject
From:
no subject
I don't think it's usually intended as 'suicidal,' but it certainly does seem to turn out that way a lot.
From:
no subject
Looking at the situation from that perspective, the story would have had to go in another direction entirely, of course. Because we can't have Brennan up and leave the show for a year there would have to be a reason, and in my mind, that reason would be that Sully would have to die before the end of the episode. In fact, I thought that the martial-arts-enthusiast might have stabbed him or something, during the stakeout to capture him. Then we could have the heart-breaking scene were Brennan tells him yes, she's going to come with him on the boat, just as he croaks in her arms.
So, no, the ultimatum never works in the long run but, in this case, I wasn't looking at Sully's offer as an ultimatum. Maybe I just don't see a year as that long a period of time any more?
And now, of course, Sully is free to turn up next season at the most...um...inopportune? time possible. Hee!
;o)
From:
no subject