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My mother always bent over backward to make guests comfortable, to the point that her own family occasionally felt embarrassed and out of place. There were two aspects of Thanksgiving dinner that often gave me the creeps when I was young: 1. Thanksgiving with certain relatives meant someone would say Grace (see below). 2. Thanksgiving with certain other relatives meant everyone in turn would have to say out loud something they were thankful for. The first still bothers me a lot though I try not to let it show. The second was more of a nuisance since I ought to have thought about such things in advance of a holiday called Thanksgiving, but usually was wracking my brain at the last second for something to say that was different and wouldn't sound idiotic to anyone including myself. And in that case getting called on first was a blessing because you could always be genuinely thankful for the relatives that came to visit that day.
I'm thankful today for:
Living in an age of transition. Having been born into a world where racism was socially approved, smoking was considered an elegant thing, and conformity was not only approved but enforced, it was easy to see things get better over time. I've learned that if you don't experience at least some of the bad, even participate willingly in some of the bad, you don't fully appreciate the good. I suspect that it won't be too much longer before tatoos/body art will go very much out of favor again. I hated bell bottom trousers even as a small child. But it took a horrifying overdose of paisley and bell bottoms in the 1970s to get the fashion industry to stop trying to force them on the public every 20 years or so (according to my mother). I suspect that in fifteen years the best of this generation's overdose of body art will start to suffer from natural aging and younger people will either return to more modest tatoos or give them up altogether again. I couldn't imagine as many benefits of living in a politically irreverent society if I hadn't been very patriotic as a kid.
By the time I started school the debate over prayer in public schools was already on. I think my parents were passively in favor of prayer (ie they didn't really think it was a great idea to force anyone to pray, but thought prayer in school generally wasn't a bad thing). Personally I discovered, before I was seven years old, that the worst thing about public prayer was putting up with prayer that didn't match my own understanding of the sanctity of my religion. As a child I was far from above praying for ridiculous and selfish things, but even as a second grader there were lines I would not cross. Hard for me to imagine a kid that young doing it, but I know perfectly well I sat silently with hands folded, pretending perfect piety, and in my head blotting out half of what my Baptist teacher thought was important for us to pray about. Fortunately, I think during my second grade year, the school board (which included my father) decided, ahead of any federal directive, to ask teachers to stop leading prayers in class. There were prayers still at sporting events and graduations through my school years, but generally by that time they were bland and devoid of any really objectionable content (ie Let's hope no one gets hurt, let's think about others as well as ourselves).
That brings us back to relatives saying Grace. Even as a small child I understood that there were horrifying things happening in the world, people every day who were afraid, in peril, needed comfort, etc., and the idea that someone was expecting the supreme deity to "bless' their food at practically every meal was and is abominable in my mind. But if there is a gracious God I'm sure she/he will forgive people for such idiocy. So even today when I visit my niece's family I sit quietly, respectfully through Grace, thinking of anything else. My niece knows I don't say grace and respects me for not actively participating like men my age in her church would be expected to do. Religion isn't a civic duty anymore, thankfully.
A curious mind. I'm no genius, but I'm happy that I've always heard other people say I was smart. Other people must despise me at times for being a know-it-all. I can't understand why everyone doesn't want to be a know-it-all. Most times it doesn't matter, but look at Donald Trump. If I'd gotten the impression on 9/11 that crowds of people in the US were cheering the collapse of the towers, I'd want to know more about what the heck was going on. But then when I saw people cheering on TV that day, I would have assumed from the background I was looking at something going on in Gaza and not New Jersey, even if I wasn't paying any attention to the commentary. When something stupid or outlandish pops into my attention. I want to know what's going on. I want to know if I'm misinterpreting something and get it straight. Apparently not everybody has that trait. Not everybody keeps a library of reference books like I do. That's understandable. Sometimes the Internet is a pain in the butt, but it's also an excellent source of reasonably good information if you are selective of where to look. Don't ask me why some people don't check more often and put their feet in their mouths less often.
Hope. My eyes are in terrible shape. I have cataracts and not so many generations ago I would have been doomed to blindness. I have an appointment to see a surgeon early next year and I have some semblance of insurance to help pay for it.
Friends. Let's face it. I'm basically a hermit. I have a small number of friends and don't spend a lot of thought wishing I had more. But I do appreciate the friends I have when I want to blow off steam or share a laugh. If you are in the US, happy Thanksgiving. If you live elsewhere, have a great week!
I'm thankful today for:
Living in an age of transition. Having been born into a world where racism was socially approved, smoking was considered an elegant thing, and conformity was not only approved but enforced, it was easy to see things get better over time. I've learned that if you don't experience at least some of the bad, even participate willingly in some of the bad, you don't fully appreciate the good. I suspect that it won't be too much longer before tatoos/body art will go very much out of favor again. I hated bell bottom trousers even as a small child. But it took a horrifying overdose of paisley and bell bottoms in the 1970s to get the fashion industry to stop trying to force them on the public every 20 years or so (according to my mother). I suspect that in fifteen years the best of this generation's overdose of body art will start to suffer from natural aging and younger people will either return to more modest tatoos or give them up altogether again. I couldn't imagine as many benefits of living in a politically irreverent society if I hadn't been very patriotic as a kid.
By the time I started school the debate over prayer in public schools was already on. I think my parents were passively in favor of prayer (ie they didn't really think it was a great idea to force anyone to pray, but thought prayer in school generally wasn't a bad thing). Personally I discovered, before I was seven years old, that the worst thing about public prayer was putting up with prayer that didn't match my own understanding of the sanctity of my religion. As a child I was far from above praying for ridiculous and selfish things, but even as a second grader there were lines I would not cross. Hard for me to imagine a kid that young doing it, but I know perfectly well I sat silently with hands folded, pretending perfect piety, and in my head blotting out half of what my Baptist teacher thought was important for us to pray about. Fortunately, I think during my second grade year, the school board (which included my father) decided, ahead of any federal directive, to ask teachers to stop leading prayers in class. There were prayers still at sporting events and graduations through my school years, but generally by that time they were bland and devoid of any really objectionable content (ie Let's hope no one gets hurt, let's think about others as well as ourselves).
That brings us back to relatives saying Grace. Even as a small child I understood that there were horrifying things happening in the world, people every day who were afraid, in peril, needed comfort, etc., and the idea that someone was expecting the supreme deity to "bless' their food at practically every meal was and is abominable in my mind. But if there is a gracious God I'm sure she/he will forgive people for such idiocy. So even today when I visit my niece's family I sit quietly, respectfully through Grace, thinking of anything else. My niece knows I don't say grace and respects me for not actively participating like men my age in her church would be expected to do. Religion isn't a civic duty anymore, thankfully.
A curious mind. I'm no genius, but I'm happy that I've always heard other people say I was smart. Other people must despise me at times for being a know-it-all. I can't understand why everyone doesn't want to be a know-it-all. Most times it doesn't matter, but look at Donald Trump. If I'd gotten the impression on 9/11 that crowds of people in the US were cheering the collapse of the towers, I'd want to know more about what the heck was going on. But then when I saw people cheering on TV that day, I would have assumed from the background I was looking at something going on in Gaza and not New Jersey, even if I wasn't paying any attention to the commentary. When something stupid or outlandish pops into my attention. I want to know what's going on. I want to know if I'm misinterpreting something and get it straight. Apparently not everybody has that trait. Not everybody keeps a library of reference books like I do. That's understandable. Sometimes the Internet is a pain in the butt, but it's also an excellent source of reasonably good information if you are selective of where to look. Don't ask me why some people don't check more often and put their feet in their mouths less often.
Hope. My eyes are in terrible shape. I have cataracts and not so many generations ago I would have been doomed to blindness. I have an appointment to see a surgeon early next year and I have some semblance of insurance to help pay for it.
Friends. Let's face it. I'm basically a hermit. I have a small number of friends and don't spend a lot of thought wishing I had more. But I do appreciate the friends I have when I want to blow off steam or share a laugh. If you are in the US, happy Thanksgiving. If you live elsewhere, have a great week!
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One scary thing about cataracts was realizing I shouldn't be driving at night. Didn't get into any problems driving. I didn't drive much at night anyway. But I knew it was time to avoid it.
Lately I've noticed the world turning sepia. You described the color change when you first talked about getting your eyes done.
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